I Can and I Will Goddammit!

Do sit at other computer so your back is facing the corridor
Do vanish to the loo if you hear the voice
Do be cool and calm if he catches you unawares (as back will be facing corridor you will be unable to see him coming).
Do email Louise the second you feel the urge to contact him in any way, shape or form (allowances are made for work related issues, however phoning him for the manhours is a bit of a grey area)
Do remember to ask for tomorrow (Tuesday) off. Its a full sunshine - make the most of it.
Do have Voodoo Child on repeat in Dave the whole way in and the whole way home, Voodoo Child makes you happy. You want to stay happy.

Do Not ask him how his bloody holiday went
Do Not set the big cheesy grin on your face the minute you see him (this will be a real test, ideally you should be in toilet before he sees you anyway)
Do Not under any circumstances email him before he emails you. You have done amazingly well not texting him for well over 2 weeks (maybe 3!). Do not ruin it all by sending an email.
Do Not reply to any email he sends for at least 2 hours. A whole day would be lovely but not realistic. Altho you will be very busy clearing everything up for the full sunshine day off (you have a list as long as your arm cos of all the skiving last Thur & Fri - get on with it!!)
Do Not give him your mobile number - if he claims to have lost it then TOUGH. If he wanted your number he would have made a note of it. He's got a brain.

Right go me! Grrrrr yeah baby!!!

Oooooh how scary I can hear a moth (or a bird?) banging on my window cos I have the light on. Must go to sleep now.