J13REK

So Mister Man turned up today in a flipping Mercedes!

I didnt actually realise even though I had seen the car in my carpark, I didnt see him emerging from it. I only clocked on when I seen his "Mercedes Benz" keyring lying on my table and thought to myself "OMG please dont tell me he's one of these ones that has a Porsche keyring but drives around in a Ford Fiesta" so I jokingly said "have you got a new car?" and he said aye.....and then it fell into place in my head that the Merc in the carpark was his. OMG. He got it a few weeks ago!!!! And never cracked a line!!

What goes on in that man's head?? We speak every single (EVERY SINGLE!) day and he doesnt tell me he has a new car???

AAAARRRGH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ucccch, Weekend Over Already

Cant believe its nearly over, is pish!

Friday night I got a wee bitty tipsy and invited Leanne over. She brought us a Subway for dinner and we watched Ugly Betty and Big Brother.

Saturday I slept in a wee bit, but made it to the hairdressers and got all my hair mega chopped off and my eyelashes tinted & eyebrows waxed. Left there and came straight home, changed my top and straight back out again to meet Kerry up Paisley to get the train to Troon!

We got to Helen's around half 4 and immediately started drinking and trampolining (trampolining is immense). We went to Apple Inn for dinner which was very delish and I'll definitely be going back.

After dinner we went to a million pubs, and got very very drunk. Kerry and I were supposed to be going home but after a 16 mile walk to the train station we discovered we missed the train. So we went back to the pub and got a bit more drunk! I forgot to mention that we all participated in a spot of Karaoke....Helen and I sang (and I use that word loosely) "does he love me, I wanna know, how can I tell if he loves me so...". We were amazing. And never got booed! Kerry sang "I got you babe, I got you babe, I got you babe, I got you babe, I got you babe" with big buff Dave. I would like to say they were magnificent but by the time they were on I was hugely steamboats and cant remember!

At the end of the night we had the beautifullest chicken pakora I've ever had in my life and I spilled the sauce all over my jeans and the taxi. I think I'm barred from that taxi. I also spilled it all over Helen's hall....not sure if I'm barred from Helen's. Kerry and I had another go on the trampoline, Helen's neighbours must hate us. Then Kerry & Helen watched Doctor Who while I nodded off on the couch.

It was the funniest night ever, my stomach muscles actually hurt from all the laughter! Immense!

So we got up this morning and caught the train at the back of 9 believe it or not! And I was safely in my bed for half 10! I got the train and a bus with very suspicious looking pakora sauce all over my crotch. I must have smelled beautiful.

Mister Man came over around half 12, awww he is a honey. I sent him a lovely text message last night "Tr6nn is scary slacy doll" heh heh I heart drunken texts.

Once he left I wandered over to my mum's house and we did a wee bit of shopping. Stayed at theirs for dinner then came home and washed my hair, did washings etc etc.

I am POOPED!

Like a Baby's Bottom!

I have in my possession my magical face creams!!

I have Origins Never A Dull Moment, Origins Clear Improvement, and Boots No. 7 Fancy Pants Moisturiser Stuff.

Currently blogging with my fancy pants face mask on, I cant wait to be beautiful!!

hOLy mOLy

Work is SO boring. Seriously I am utterly demented. Its so boring I'm too bored to even talk about it. I left at 4.30pm bang on as I had an urgent mission to get home before 5.35. I felt like Lara Croft, power walking down St. Vincent Street. On the way down I seen 3 Arriva buses drive past, no doubt all of them would have been mine. Miraculously I made it home for 5.25, it was amazing, I havent managed to get home for before 6pm in months!!! I settled down with my beans on toast to watch Neighbours, I was desperate to see Izzy from Neighbours. I heart Izzy, she's immense.

My special magical creams that are going to make me beautiful have been delivered to my parents and my dad's going to bring me them tomorrow. Tomorrow night I will be exfoliated, face masked and moisturised up! Oh yes! And then Thursday morning I will wake up looking like (a much fatter and shorter) Claudia Schiffer. Very excited.

Mister Man came over last night. Lubby jubbly! I told him he's not allowed back over til his birthday weekend - I cant wait til his birthday weekend! I'm going to buy his favourite fudge donuts from Aulds and we're gonna munch them, open presents and snog.

I got a £500 factor's bill in today.

ROSS & LIDDELL SUCK!!!! THIEVING B*******

A Closed Book

I received one of those quizzy emails during the week. You know the ones, there's a list of about 30 questions such as "eye colour, favourite ice cream flavour, what colour's your underwear".

I filled in all my answers and sent it out to three people. One of whom was Mister Man who I never expected in a million years to send back to me. But he did.

One of the questions was "who do you miss the most". His answer was "my parents". Both his parents died of cancer, first his dad when he was a young teen and then his mum in his early twenties.

Just a few days before I'd been having a wee think about how he never mentions his parents, ever ever. I remember bringing his mum up once and he changed the subject. Stupidly I wondered if they had mis-treated him and that's why he never spoke about them. Eejit that I am.

Anyway, it broke my heart reading that one answer. It broke my heart that he misses them so much and it broke my heart that I didnt know it.

I wish he would talk to me more.

Another Weekend Over

Gads what a wet and miserable weekend. Made even more miserable by the fact that the whole world and their granny is off tomorrow for a long weekend except me! (And my fellow colleagues obviously). But its not all bad. Lawnmower man is off alllllllllll week so cant complain too much.

I had a rubbish night's sleep so managed to flaming sleep in til after 10am today. Popped over to my mum's to drop off my dad's sat nav gadgie then picked Kerry up at Braehead and went to Xscape for lunch. That's twice in 2 days I've been there.....and looking down now at my protruding belly it shows!! Think I'll need to skip dinner!

OMG the pelican nesting on my roof is seriously driving me bananas!!

R.I.P June in the Afternoon. You'll be missed by us all.

Litte Miss Pee Your Pants

Just had conversation with guy next door. He was drunk, I knew this the second I seen him, dont ask me how, but I did.

Anyway I digress, he asked me if Pee Your Pants was anything to do with me, i.e. was she my friend. I told him "no" and also told him that I phoned the Police (who took her away) and my bruv. He said she had tried to get into his flat using keys but he got up out his bed and opened the door and told her to go away (think he put it a bit nicer than that though). He had his work that morning (which I had already worked out anyway....just call me Miss Marple) so he was keen to get back to his bed. Next he said he was watching her through his peephole and he seen her head down the stairs and then come back up them and just sit outside my door. From his bed he heard the boys asking her where she lived and he heard the Police saying she had to move off down the stairs. So....we're not really any the wiser. I knew in my bones he had nothing to do with her.

I dont know whether he will remember any of the conversation as Doosan finish work at half 2 and that's him just getting home. Ah but he works shifts so would have finished earlier than half 2. Although he could have came home first to get changed and then went to pub. Unless he wasnt at work today at all (as he works shifts) and has been out since lunchtime!! Oookaaay must stop analysing every little thing, its none of my business how long he's been at the pub!!

Today was mince. Friday is my "bin lady" day when I go round all the recycle paper bins and empty them and put a new bin bag in. I do NOT enjoy this. Especially when I break a nail...sniff.

Then my mum wanted me to go to Debenhams with her as there was a huge sale on (not; also mince) so I trudged along behind her wincing in agony, my feet were absolutely killing me from shoes that are too big for me....and too pointy. I managed to force myself into buying 3 tops and 2 boobtubes, it did not alleviate the pain any but its always nice to buy new things. They were so sore I made my dad drive to the bus stop in Dave and drive me the 2 minute walk from the bus stop to my mum's house. I am a poor little soldier.

Which brings me nicely to Dave! Dave is home....back in his favourite carpark space! He smells of boy but that's ok, I'll buy him a nice air freshener next time I'm at Tesco (Note to self: need to go to Tesco urgently...you have NO food in). Other than that he's unharmed and glad to be home.

And now....its jammy time. Reeeelax dude.